"Maybe I just wasn't meant to be a mom..." At POEM, we've heard it so much from moms suffering from PPD, we included it in our common feelings right on the homepage of our website.
A mother recently wrote to Carolyn Hax at the Washington Post, confessing similar feelings. And, it seems that her husband's having a hard time, too.
Carolyn gave this mom excellent advice - go talk to your doctor, get screened for PPD & do it right away. Absolutely.
Now, there's no certainty that this mom does have PPD, but she definitely seems to be suffering from unrealistic expectations. She mentions that she can't talk to anyone because of the shame of their "failure." What has this couple failed? What was the test? For the most part, as long as your trying your best - you're passing. Loving parenthood all the time is impossible. And she's reaching out, looking for help. That's the mark of a good parent - doing what you have to do to promote the health of your family.
In addition to a doctor visit and screening - This family situation cries out for the care that is Postpartum Support International. Not only can PSI provide them much needed empathetic listening, but peer support often helps families understand that it's a myth that parents should love being parents all the time.
The local PSI coordinator can offer her compassion, understanding and hope for the future.
And, there's help just for Dad: There's a fantastic resource called the Postpartum Dads Project. And, he can contact the PSI Dads coordinators, listed at the bottom of the resources page on PSI's website.
Indeed, Ms. Hax, call in the troops.
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